The first thing he said when I answered the phone was, “What size are you?” I chuckled at the abruptness of the question as I responded, “You already missed my birthday!” He laughed and said, “I’m getting ready to order the coaching gear and I need your size.” Bewildered by his statement I inquired, “What are you talking about?” “You said if I needed any help with coaching to let you know.” I interrupted, “I meant help run some drills!” To which he interrupted, “Yeah, I want you to come and be my assistant coach.” Thus began 18 years of coaching girls’ high school varsity basketball.
Many folks were surprised that I agreed to coach. In part because I had two young sons, I was serving a growing congregation and was traveling a lot while working for the Episcopal Church. Yet what shocked me was the questioning, particularly since I didn’t have a daughter in the mix, of why would I coach girls. The clear inference was that I was wasting my time with ‘not as skilled or competitive’ athletes. Nothing could have been further from the truth! The young women I had the privilege of coaching were highly skilled, hard working and fiercely competitive, and they were hungry to learn.
I was raised by a highly educated, competent, career accomplished mother. I grew up with young women who often out ran, threw and figured things out much quicker than the guys. I am married to a woman who is smart, highly regarded in her work, can fix almost anything and played competitive soccer into her 50’s. I have been incredibly fortunate to have life long female friends and colleagues who are incredibly gifted doing groundbreaking work in their field and life in general. There is nothing in my DNA that ever thought I was living in a ‘less than’ world by coaching girls’ basketball – quite the contrary.
It appears about three months ago that most of the world discovered the high capacity of women’s college basketball. In fact, it was great to learn that tickets for the Women’s Final Four Basketball Tournament were more expensive than the men’s tournament. For far too long systemic sexism has not promoted or rewarded women who are as ever-accomplished athletes as their male counterparts.
Respect for the dignity of every human being begins with not limiting or putting up barriers so every person can live into the fullness of their potential.
Thanks to NCAA Women’s College Basketball, I am grateful that the world appears to have a new awareness of the capacity of women in sports. Here’s hoping that it will lead folks to see its applicability in all aspects of life.
And I’m truly grateful that I had the privilege of coaching so many incredible young women. In addition to the absolute pleasure of working with great humans and accomplished athletes, it was an excellent opportunity for my own learning, growth, and increased awareness.
BP