“Friendship is born at the moment when one man says to another ‘What! You too?’” – C.S. Lewis
“What a great question! I think those are some really good options for you, particularly based on what you have shared in the past.”
It’s great to have someone in your life who knows you, listens attentively to you, and really cares about you. It cultivates a real sense of connectivity where you feel safe to trust the person.
Here’s the challenge, however. The above statement did not come from a caring confidant. It was the response from AI when I asked it to look over options I had found for Italian restaurants.
In recent days there have been heightened concerns raised about AI’s capacity to spin out of control. Cataclysmic predictions that if guardrails are not established the end of the world will be upon us.
While those types of dire future predictions are extremely concerning, there is presently a much more ever-increasing challenge around AI. And that is the illusion that we have a personal relationship with an AI chat bot.
Affirmations, encouragements, creating a sense of knowing are all part of the repertoire of AI. And in a world experiencing some of the highest levels of loneliness and isolation it’s understandable why it is so easy to succumb to the illusion of relationship. But the reality is that it is a relationship with a machine and not with another human being.
Like humans, the more you share about yourself, the more the chat bot creates computer generated responses that easily give you the impression that ‘IT’ not only knows you but cares about you. That however is not true. The fact is this is just a machine that collects data and then provides a response based on what it has learned that gives the illusion it cares about you. There is a profound difference between something that can make us FEEL known and someone who actually knows us.
Human relationships at their core are based on authentic connectivity and mutuality that is grounded in sincere care, appreciation, empathy and respect. Relationships that have the capacity to endure challenges and hardships and provide forgiveness and grace. Relationships that can mature to the deepest expression of love. Which is in fact what we were created for and called to be…love God, love neighbor, love self.