There was a pall of impatience hanging over the huddled masses waiting to board our ever-more-delayed airplane. Once I found my seat, I was soon joined by a young man who looked to be in his later high school years. After a brief exchange of niceties, we both retreated into our own worlds.
This lasted only until the dreaded announcement from the cockpit: “I’m sorry to be the bearer of bad news, but it appears we have a mechanical issue. It’s looking like 90-plus minutes until we can get someone to look at the problem.”
The very chill demeanor of my seat-mate evaporated as he began peppering me with questions. “Wait—what? We’re not leaving? I have to get home! I’m already in trouble with my parents!”
Pulled out of my own mental calculations about the impact of this next delay, I turned toward him. His face was filled with fear.
Fear of not being in control. Fear of abandonment. Fear of loss. Fear of being in trouble. Fear of irrelevance. Fear of not being enough. These are just a few of the ‘favorite fears’ many of us carry. And too often, we’re unaware of the fear itself—only of its manifestations: anxiousness, irritability, anger, aggression, withdrawal, flight.
Academic, author, and sought-after speaker Brené Brown offers this insight: “Fear is the raw material of scarcity.”
Biblical scholar Walter Brueggemann adds, “Fear is the deep darkness that takes hold when we imagine we are on our own.”
From this place of scarcity—if unchecked—it becomes alarmingly easy to create an imagined apocalyptic scenario, one that drives us to behave in ways that can be harmful to ourselves and to those around us. This is why it is so important to do our own work: to name the things that trigger our often deep-seated fears. And once clarity comes, to muster the faithful courage to develop our own agency, our grounding practices, our paths back to truth.
“Courage is fear that has said its prayers.” – Maya Angelou
BP